There are times when you wake up and instantly feel overwhelmed and confused about what you should do. Things might be weighing heavily on your mind, and you’re prone to either making rash decisions or avoiding them altogether.
Making rash decisions is a maneuver used to protect yourself. You’re trying to hurry up and get past the pain and worry by rushing through it. It’s almost like going through a haunted house that scares you – you go as fast as you can to rush past the scariness of it all.
Ignoring things is also a move meant to protect you. You’re subconsciously deciding to avoid and ignore issues because facing them is too difficult and you don’t want to experience the emotions that come with it.
There’s a different way you can handle problems like this when they arise. It’s by blogging thoughtfully and in an organized fashion as you work through them strategically.
You can develop your own systematic approach to overwhelming times, such as starting with a three-pronged approach where you first discuss the problem, then the various options one by one, and finally, your selection of how to deal with it.
This forces you to be thoughtful about your pending moves. Let’s look at an example. Maybe you wake up one day worried and confused about how to handle a crumbling marriage.
You would first discuss the problems in the situation – how you’re feeling, how your spouse is feeling, the kids’ involvement, finances, and any other factors that are bringing this anxiety to the surface.
Then, tackle the possible solutions you could pursue and brainstorm how it might play out. For example, you might start with the most dramatic choice of filing for divorce. Walk yourself through what that would mean to each individual, as well as how it would affect your life in every way you can imagine – housing, time with the kids, finances, happiness, etc.
Keep going through other choices – couples counseling, reading a book like Love Languages to see if you can solve things on your own, changing careers to allow for more time together, making changes in how you react or in yourself, etc.
Doing this allows you to give careful consideration to each option before making a final decision. You might even see an opportunity to combine solutions. But it prevents you from making the situation worse with a kneejerk reaction or avoidance.
